Motherhood: The Mommy Monster

Many of my clients come in dealing with the stresses of parenting. I recently had a client tell me that yelling had become a part of her discipline strategy. As we all know, yelling serves to create little people who parrot back the yelling, even if the yelling is slightly cathartic for us at the time. I have come to see this yelling and frustration on the part of the mom as our alter ego, Mommy Monster. Ok, so this is not the loving wonderful side that we want to show our children. So what do we do to tame the monster? (Short answer: Self Care...Self Care...Self Care)

As I write this I find myself praying that my almost 3 year old will keep taking a nap and that my 6 month old will not start crying. I have carved out a few minutes to get this message out!

Taming the Mommy Monster 101:
I have found that as moms we do not take care of ourselves very well. We are last on our To Do lists if we make the list at all. We put our children first often to the detriment of our relationships with our partners and definitely to the detriment of ourselves. I suggest that if we do not start caring for ourselves we are not going to be able to care for the ones we love.

Take time for mommy! Or better yet take time for the person that you are outside of the mommy role. Find a few minutes each day to take care of yourself. This means something different to each person and I know that finding the time may seem impossible. Give it a try and see if a little stress relief for you might translate into a longer fuse with your children. (Our future goal will be to eliminate the fuse altogether, but lets be realistic to start given that we are indeed only human!) This challenge may mean that you have to ask for help. The saying "It takes a village to raise a child" is so true. We all need help. If you feel that asking for it is a sign of weakness consider the damage not asking for it might do as well.

Try to create a relaxation ritual for yourself and start by asking yourself in general: What do I Need?